Sign in a Laundromat AUTOMATIC WASHING MACHINES: PLEASE REMOVE ALL YOUR CLOTHES WHEN THE LIGHT GOES OUT
Sign in a London department store: BARGAIN BASEMENT UPSTAIRS
In an office: WOULD THE PERSON WHO TOOK THE STEP LADDER YESTERDAY PLEASE BRING IT BACK OR FURTHER STEPS WILL BE TAKEN
In an office: AFTER TEA BREAK STAFF SHOULD EMPTY THE TEAPOT AND STAND UPSIDE DOWN ON THE DRAINING BOARD
On a church door: THIS IS THE GATE OF HEAVEN. ENTER YE ALL BY THIS DOOR. (THIS DOOR IS KEPT LOCKED BECAUSE OF THE DRAFT. PLEASE USE SIDE DOOR.)
Outside a secondhand shop: WE EXCHANGE ANYTHING – BICYCLES, WASHING MACHINES ETC. WHY NOT BRING YOUR WIFE ALONG AND GET A WONDERFUL BARGAIN?
Outside a photographer’s studio: OUT TO LUNCH: IF NOT BACK BY FIVE, OUT FOR DINNER ALSO
Notice in a dry cleaner’s window: ANYONE LEAVING THEIR GARMENTS HERE FOR MORE THAN 30 DAYS WILL BE DISPOSED OF.
Notice in health food shop window: CLOSED DUE TO ILLNESS
Spotted in a safari park: ELEPHANTS PLEASE STAY IN YOUR CAR
Seen during a conference: FOR ANYONE WHO HAS CHILDREN AND DOESN’T KNOW IT, THERE IS A DAY CARE ON THE FIRST FLOOR
Notice in a field: THE FARMER ALLOWS WALKERS TO CROSS THE FIELD FOR FREE, BUT THE BULL CHARGES
Message on a leaflet: IF YOU CANNOT READ, THIS LEAFLET WILL TELL YOU HOW TO GET LESSONS
Sign on a repair shop door: WE CAN REPAIR ANYTHING. (PLEASE KNOCK HARD ON THE DOOR – THE BELL DOESN’T WORK)
Spotted in a toilet in a London office block: TOILET OUT OF ORDER. PLEASE USE FLOOR BELOW
Funny…..Very, some.
Absolutely halarious!!!!!!!
excellent very funny
Those are funny! Most also show why good punctuation is important.
lol
what a cracker 10/10 brilllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll and fabbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbb
Those are good!!!! Any more?
These are just so brilliantly funny – thanks for that my sides hurt!!
Ok, if you saw and collected all these yourself, I am impressed. However I am inclined to cynically believe you read them somewhere and have used the magic of Cut and Paste to predictable effect.
i liked the last one…and yes i have squatted on a few floors…but not b/c of an out of order sign…the floor just looked alot cleaner! lol
:O)
really good not heard them before makes a change
Yeah, and if toilet out of order please use the floor below!
those are good.
someone should show that second to last one to alanis, chick’s got trouble with the concept of irony.
Excellent !!! Very Original and Funny !!! Involuntarilyyou get smile on your face and you can’t resist to appreciate the author ! Superb piece of work !
cool joke hers one
knock,knock
whos there?
jake
jake who?
jake the steak
Oh God, it took me a while to answer because I’m laughing so hard, thank you!
Those were all funny! ^_^ Some of them are true too!
Ha ha ha! Especially liked the last one!
LMFAO (another thumbs ^ for you) Love the signs
)
Those are hilarious mate.Here are a few more for your collection.
In a greengrocer’s–Please don’t handle the fruit.Ask for Debbie.
In a health shop window–Closed due to illness.
In a doctor’s waiting room–Stroke patients:don’t feel alone.
In a barber’s shop–Haircuts half price today.Only one per customer.
On a plumber’s van–We repair what your husband fixed.
In a jeweller’s shop–Our gifts will not last long at these prices.
In a hospital–Dangerous drugs must be locked up with Matron.
On a building site–Night-watchman patrols this area 24 hours a day.
In a restaurant–Steaks and chops are grilled before our customers.
On the door of a maternity ward–Push,push,push.
In a launderette–Automatic washing machines.Please remove all your clothes when the light goes out.
On a repair shop door–We can repair anything(Please knock hard on the door-the bell doesn’t work.)
On an office photocopying machine–The typists reproduction equipment is not to be interfered with without the prior permission of the manager.
In a hotel–Ladies are requested not to have children in the Cocktail Room.
In a Finnish washroom– To stop the drip,turn co-k to right.
Very funny,also in hotel sign saying all water in this establishment has been passed by the management,due to the cast of toilet paper will customers please use both sides,in a golf club will members please refrain from washing there balls in the sink,thank you,in a public house when the floor is full please use the ashtrays provided,